1

When my cousin was just two years old, her mom had got pregnant again. One day she had gone to hug her moms belly and said, Little brother sick. A few days later she actually had a miscarriage. Sounds a bit shocking, is it not?

2

My 6-year-old daughter was just in the passenger seat a few days ago and looked at me and said, Dad, when Im seven Im going to kill you. No wait, when Im eight. I asked, How are you going to do that? She smiled a bit and said, Im going to drive over your head with this car.

3

My 3 years old daughter was in the bath while playing with her soft toys with me and laughing just like that without any reason as children generally do. Suddenly her face deadpans, she just stares at me in the eye, and tells me in a very serious little voice, Mummy, if you bit and ate all my fingers off I wouldnt love you anymore.

4

My daughter was just 3 years old then, she walked downstairs in the morning and said, Look what I can do! and she crossed her eyes. It was then that I asked her how she learned to do that and she said, The boy taught me at night.

Me: What boy?

Her: The boy with the glasses He did this! And she held her finger up and then zoomed it to her nose and crossed her eyes again.

She said that he only laughed and laughed.

Not too scary, right? Only . . . . . that is the way how my brother taught me to cross my eyes when I was 5 years old. He had died when I was just 7 years old.

5

Not a parent, but just a former teacher.

I taught English in a school in Spain, and I was not really supposed to let the kids know that I speak Spanish so that they were forced to communicate only in English. A 10 years old girl comes up to me one day, grabs me by the hand, and says, with the most horrifying, straight face ever, Te vas a la muerte, or Youre going to die.

I was so much shocked at the randomness of it that even my jaw must have dropped. She then laughed her head off and said, HA! You DO speak Spanish! She then skipped away, just laughing and smiling.

It the creepiest thing a kid has ever said to me. And probably the cleverest thing a kid ever did while I was just a teacher.

6

My 4 years old son said, Daddy, I want to drill into your tummy, crawl inside and eat your dinner. The food was alright but I did not think it was actually worth that much effort.

7

When my son was very small, I was talking to him about growing potatoes. I was describing how you bank up the earth around them as they grow, and he said, I used to do that when I was an old man.

8

My mother-in-law was picking my son up from school because I had some things to do. She was actually supposed to just drop him off (I really hate that horrible woman), but instead he comes running through the door and just yells, Daddy I invited grandma for dinner.

9

I was actually explaining to my niece the distinction between things that can and cannot change about people. She was very much confused because she had met a set of three siblings and the eldest was not the tallest.

So I told her that one day even SHE, an itty bitty four-year-old could be taller than me, when she is a big huge grownup. But even if she was taller, I would always be older to her.

She just looked me very seriously and said, Youll be dead sooner too.

10

When you turn off the lights, thats when the black circles come. They come down like this (holds his hands in the air above his bed), and they stay for a second, then zoop! they go inside! (slapping the hands to his chest).

Then, just barely holding back tears, I hate it.